"In today's rush, we all think too much, seek too much, want too much and forget about the joy of just being." ~Eckhart Tolle
We live in a society that focuses on “doing” – we are all human “doings” rushing from one activity to the next crossing things off our never-ending to do list. When do we spend time as human “beings?” Can you think of the last time you felt the “joy of just being?” You must understand that prior to developing a daily meditation and mindfulness practice, I was a human doer. I believed in the Western philosophy that success is based upon all of your accomplishments and all you “do.” I was an overachiever and running so fast in the rat race of life that a friend gave me the book “Art of Doing Nothing” by Vienne and Lennard. The book provides ideas for “being” including tips on the art of breathing, listening, bathing, lounging, napping, and so much more. Take some time today to just “be.” Take long slow deep breaths, go for a walk without having the purpose to get somewhere, meditate for a few minutes, take a relaxing bath, pamper yourself, watch a sunset, spend time in silence or whatever works for you to slow down. Don’t feel guilty about doing these things; know that you are nurturing your soul. What can you do to foster the “joy of just being?”
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Photography by William Walther WjW Photography “When you arise in the morning, think of what a precious privilege it is to be alive – to breathe, to think, to enjoy, to love.” ~ Marcus Aurelius
We have had a beautiful May in Tucson. It is the first year that I recall where we haven’t hit triple digits. That is about to change and we aren’t just going to temperatures of 100 degrees, but probably over 110 degrees and the grousing has started. But, does it help or hurt to complain about the weather? I have been reading a great book by Janice Kaplan called “The Gratitude Diaries” where she takes a year to express gratitude and it transformed her life. Janice lives in New York and she has a section where she talks about the brutally cold weather and snow in her hometown. One day she shares she was exhausted after all of the griping about the weather she had heard on he way to work. Whining about the weather has absolutely no effect on the weather, but it does have an effect on the energy of your conversations and mood. Janice states, “Announce too often that you’re miserable, and you begin to believe you really are.” I understand that I have no magical powers, although I do wish I could fly. I cannot wave a wand and change the weather, but I can change my thoughts and words about the weather. I can be grateful to live in a place with blue skies and sunshine and appreciate that I am fortunate to have air conditioning in my house and that all of the places I go have air conditioning. Plus, it's a dry heat. Pay attention to how often people complain about the weather, and see if you can change the negative attitude with your positive comment. The weather provides the perfect opportunity for you to practice letting go of things you can't control. And by the way, you cannot control anything but your thoughts, words, and actions. So practice acceptance with the easy stuff like weather - it is what it is. Do you complain about the weather? Does the venting help or hurt your mood? What can you do to transform your approach to things you cannot change like the weather? “I used to care so much about what others think about I almost didn't have a thought of my own” ~ Natasha Bedingfield
A friend of mine recently shared a picture of her granddaughter on Facebook going to the 8th grade promotion dance. It was an adorable picture of her smiling granddaughter in a cute white dress with pleats and lace and her date in a jacket with a red bow tie. It wasn’t until I clicked on the picture that I saw the complete photograph that showed the couple wearing high top Vans tennis shoes; she was in red tennis shoes that matched her red wrist corsage and he in blue high tops. I just loved it. If you are going to a dance and want to dance a lot and enjoy it, you should wear tennis shoes! Tennis shoes are indeed the answer! How many times have I gone to proms, dances, and weddings and worn shoes that weren’t ideal for dancing? I have never worn high heals – I would break a leg walking in high heals – so dancing in them would be out of the question. I am not a “girly” girl who lusts after Jimmy Choo shoes, but whenever I have gone to dances I have worn “dressy” shoes. One of my keys to purchasing shoes is comfort, but seeing these kids wear tennis shoes shows me that I cared about what others thought about me as I would never have worn tennis shoes to a dance. And I must also ask, what is the point of those high heels and most women take them off and dance in bare feet. So, once again I believe tennis shoes are the answer. The peer pressure I felt in elementary school, high school and college made me always think and care what others would thought about what I wore, how I looked and how I would fit in. Although, I must admit in some of the recent pictures people are posting online, I wished some friends would have given me a little more fashion advice. The picture of the kids in their high top tennis shoes and the quote from Natasha Bedinfield’s song remind me of the importance of doing what is right for me and knowing in my heart that it doesn’t matter what others think. What others think is usually a reflection of them and not me. So, I learned a great lesson from these 8th graders. I must always be open to learn and recognize that teachers come in all ages. They taught me a great lesson: Tennis shoes are the answer! Would you wear tennis shoes to a dance? How much time do you spend worrying about what others think? There are only 3 things that can make your dreams come true: your thoughts, your words, and your actions. ~Mike Dooley
I am in charge of my life. No one else is in charge. I cannot expect others to make me happy or to make my dreams come true. It is all up to me. I need to clearly set my intentions on the dreams in my life and then focus my attention on making those things come true. I need to pay attention to what I think as negative thoughts are not helping my dreams come true. Mike Dooley also says, “thoughts become things, choose the good ones.” So, when I am aware that I have thought something negative about a situation, or myself, I quickly change it to a positive thought. I pay attention to what I say. Many times it is better not to say anything if I am not adding to the content of the conversation in a meaningful way. Many times, my ego just wants to add something and it is totally unnecessary. The final thing I pay attention to are my actions – what am I actually doing and is it bringing me closer to my dreams. It is important for me to set my intentions and attention daily so that my dreams come true. How do you make your dreams come true? Do you rely on others to make your dreams come true? “When life gives you lemons, make lemonade and ask for salt and tequila!” ~unknown To me, life has become a series of reframing situations that I used to label as “bad” into opportunities for growth. This is not always easy, but with practice it continues to become easier. This week, I was teaching classes and a person dropped out because the class didn’t meet her expectations. My first reaction was to be upset with myself and of course my ego and pride got involved that I wasn’t good enough and just as I was about to spiral into all of the self-doubt thoughts, I became aware of what I was thinking. I stopped the cycle and asked myself, "what I should learn from this situation?" The “me from my twenties” would have blamed the other person, but at least with age I have become wiser and now take responsibility – I understood that the other person was correct. So, I realized that the communication in my email and flyers was not clear. So, in the future I will be more conscious about what I communicate. I know what I am doing, but it obviously wasn’t clear to others in my communications. Instead of hours and days of beating myself up, I learned something and moved on. But, the great news is that I journaled about it and I opened myself to the world of infinite possibilities and realized that the lesson was not only to learn to be clearer in my communications, but that people want to have classes with longer meditations and time in silence. So, the creative juices started flowing about creating a daylong class about going within and I am really excited about future classes. What I had originally seen as a flaw in my character was a lesson to take my meditation classes in a new direction. Not only did I make lemonade out of the lemons, but I am enjoying the party with tequila. So often before in my life, I never saw my mistakes as something to capitalize and grow from, but saw them as just more proof that I am an unworthy person. This philosophy of looking for what I am supposed to learn from mistakes and challenges allows more doors to open and to see life from a different perspective. I am grateful to this teacher in my life. I just have to stay open to see and learn. How do you make lemonade from the lemons in your life? “The future, the worry, the regret, the anxiety – these are all mental events that do not have to be part of the difficulty of life; these can be transcended here and now.”
Eckhart Tolle The here and now is all there is and ever will be and this is a lesson that I seem to keep needing to learn over and over every day. I know that I continually work on living in the present moment and that I am getting better at it. I am more fully engaged when I chat with others – I really listen to them and don’t plan the next thing I am going to say. I live in the present moment when I am doing things I love like painting, gardening, taking a bath and doing anything creative. However, I catch myself not living in the present moment when my thoughts drift off to worrying about things that might happen. I stop myself and ask, “is anything bad happening in this moment?” and the answer is usually no. But, my ego drifts off and thinks, “something bad could happen” or “maybe because I did this, people are going to be upset.” Yes, something bad could happen and if it does, I will deal with it then. And yes, I will do things in life that may upset others, but I have no control over how others react. I only have control over what I do and I am doing the best at making conscious decisions that will positively impact me and those effected by my decision. I want to live in the present moment and leave these mental events that cause suffering behind. There is only this moment. How much time do you spend living in the mental world of worry, regret and anxiety? What can you do to live more in the present moment? Let us be grateful to the people who make us happy; they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom. ~Marcel Proust
In our lives we hopefully all have friends who are in our corner, who support and love us for who were are even with our traits and flaws. I am so blessed to have so many friends in my corner who are my cheerleaders and are there for me when I fall down. One of the major things that I have learned in life is that I don’t have to do things alone and that there are people there to help me pick up the pieces and support me when I am not my strongest. I was struggling with a situation and the universe came to my aide with a friend who called just at the right time and I shared my situation. She was a good listener and helped give me perspective to remember that I am a good and worthy person doing the best I can. No one can tell me what to do or how to proceed (although there are always times in life that I would just like to say – please tell me what do to); I know that is my responsibility. But I am grateful to be able to ask the “charming gardeners” in my life for help as soul blossoms again. Who can you call upon the help your soul blossom in times of need? How can you help others during times of need? “No one can rob me from my happiness… No one can drive me crazy unless I accept the passenger seat.” ~ Alan Cohen
In life, we will all experience situations that we perceive as adverse or unpleasant. We may work hard and others will be critical. We are never responsible for what others think of us, but we are responsible for our reactions to what they say or do. I have determined that I need to have a plan for entering situations that in the past may have been unpleasant. First, I need to let go of the past, it happened, it doesn’t mean that it will happen again. So, I set a positive intention. For example, for an upcoming meeting I have set the intention for a positive experience filled with love, learning and creativity. I envision myself filling the room with love and positive energy. I set the intention, but I let go of the outcome. Usually after the meeting, people will come up and tell me things that I view as criticisms. I remember that I choose how I perceive these comments and now I set the intention to view them as suggestions and not criticisms. When they are offer suggestions, I will thank them for their ideas. I will truly listen and be grateful that they care. I will reflect on them at another time and see what needs to be acted upon. But during the meeting I will breathe deeply and not let my ego take over and react with anger. I will remember that all acts are an expression of love or a call for love. I will choose to send love. I will come from my highest spiritual self. Do you let others rob your from your happiness or drive you crazy? If yes, what can you do change how you perceive the situation and have more peace? “One must always be aware, to notice—even though the cost of noticing is to become responsible.” ~ Thylias Moss One of the key things that I have learned after attending numerous Chopra Center programs is the importance of developing the witnessing awareness. Just stop for a minute and witness who is reading this blog entry. Look at yourself as if you are watching yourself in a movie as you read the blog and begin to become aware of yourself and what you are doing. You can develop the witnessing awareness with a mindfulness practice where you observe your thoughts, emotions, and sensations without judging them as good or bad. It was important for me to practice this on everyday normal activities so I could apply this technique during challenging opportunities. Now, when I become angry or upset, I stop before reacting and saying anything I will later regret and notice that I am upset. I ask myself “who is upset?” and “who is offended?” I take a deep breath and come from a place of heart-centered awareness and respond from my highest self instead of the person who wants to yell back or give a snarky and sarcastic retort. Then I find time to journal about this and see if I can get to the bottom of why my ego is hurt. Does it go back to issues I have with abandonment or feeling like I am not good enough, or is it another issue that I still need to resolve. Once I process the situation, I let it go and move on to the present moment. You must understand that I work on this and sometimes I let go within an hour and other times it may take me a day or longer. But, I let go much faster now than I ever used to in the past and with practice I know I will get even better. Developing the witnessing awareness has helped me come from a more positive and peaceful place during stressful times. However, because I am aware of what I am doing, saying, and thinking, I know that I am responsible for my actions and I consciously make more reflective choices. How can you develop your witnessing awareness? Are you responsible for your actions, words and thoughts? Photography by William Walther WjW Photography “One has not only an ability to perceive the world but an ability to alter one's perception of it; more simply, one can change things by the manner in which one looks at them.” ~ TOM ROBBINS
I decided to continue with the concept of seeing without labeling and apply it to how we view people and situations. Once, I spent some time in nature and practiced seeing without labeling it became easier. I was just able to “be” in nature and didn’t have to label the beautiful sunsets, flowers, animals, or anything else, because in actuality, there are not really words that do it justice. I am now more serene and just experience the present moment. In terms of seeing people, I am working on being non-judgmental and not labeling them based on race, gender, sexual preference, height, weight, style of clothing, attitude or the other myriad of ways that we judge people. Awareness is the key to realize how often we label people. Take one day and just practice awareness and see how many times you put a label on someone. We don’t know these people; we don’t know their story or situation. Who are we to judge? Now, when I catch myself applying a label to a person, I acknowledge that I have done that (I don’t beat myself up as that never helps) and I silently send that person love and light. The interesting thing that I have noticed is that because of this practice, I find myself judging and labeling less. The final part of not labeling for me is not labeling situations as “good” or “bad” or with any other judgment. This is easy to do when things are going well. But, when something happens that I did not plan on occurring, I try to accept that this is the way things are at this moment. Acceptance and surrender makes life so much easier and I don’t waste energy being angry or upset. Because sometimes, those things I would have labeled as “bad” end up being a lesson I needed to learn or have a much better outcome than I had planned for in the long run. It takes patience and practice to stop labeling, but I am reaping the benefits of the process. What happens if you stop labeling people? What happens if you stop labeling situations? “The voyage of discovery is not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes.” ~Marcel Proust
One of the things I focused on when I was at the Chopra Center Silent retreat was to really look at things deeply; to see things without labeling them. For when we see things and immediately label them, we move on and don’t really see the essence of that flower, tree, cloud, or even that person. When we label a flower, we know what a flower is, we’ve seen tons of flowers in our lives, and even when we label it as a rose or a tulip, we still miss that particular rose or tulip and all it has to offer. During April, I spend more time in nature and focus on being and not doing. Yesterday, we had a lovely cloudy afternoon that brought the wonderful fragrance of rain. I just sat in my backyard and looked at the sky, the plants, the birds and everything else and just took them in without labeling each thing I saw, heard or smelled (I had to list them here because labels is how we communicate and this blog would be boring without words). I was living in the present moment and it was blissful! Try going into nature and see if you can see deeply without labels. What is it like to look deeply using all of your senses? Walking Meditation Poem
I take refuge in Mother Earth. Every breath, every step manifests our love. Every breath brings happiness. Every step brings happiness. I see the whole cosmos in the earth. Thich Nhat Hanh Today was a heavenly day in Tucson; the skies were overcast yet you could still see areas of cerulean blue amongst the cirrus clouds. The temperature was in the high 70’s, so it was perfect for being outside and taking in the beauty of the spring foliage of the golden yellow Palo Verde tree blossoms. It was an ideal time for me to do a walking meditation. The purpose of a walking meditation is to bring the body and mind together peacefully. This is not the time I do a power walk or actively pursue my 10,000 daily steps. When you practice mindful walking, your purpose is to bring your attention to the physical experience of walking. With a walking meditation you take small steps and you do not go anywhere. Usually you have a goal to walk somewhere, but with a walking meditation you have no destination in mind. The goal is to be in the present moment with full awareness of the experience of walking – getting somewhere is not the goal. When you walk mindfully, you see the beauty and the wonder of the earth around you, and you wake up. You can do a walking meditation inside, outside, by yourself, or with a group. Have you ever really slowed down and paid attention to the experience of walking? Try walking mindfully and experiencing the beauty around you and share the experience. “Nobody can bring you peace but yourself.” ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson
I know that some days are busier than others, but on the really busy days I make sure I start the day from a quiet place filled with peace. The other day, I had a full day of chores and I worked hard all day. But, I set the intention to come from a place of peace and took the time to start my day with meditation and time in nature. Before starting my tasks, I enjoyed my cup of coffee sitting in the back yard. I just stopped and looked and watched the bugs and the birds. The irrigation system had just watered the plants and the leaves had water on them. I admired a finch that sat on the edge of the pot and took sips of water off the leaves. I noticed all of the varied colors of green on just one plant. I was inspired by how much the plants had grown and matured since I pruned them back in January. I was in awe of the roses and the different blooms in a variety of stages from buds to full blooms to dying. I was grateful to be able to sit outdoors. I listened to the birds and heard the wind and just took the time to appreciate the gift of nature. Taking those few minutes to be inspired by nature set the tone for the day made all the difference in how I dealt with a busy and hectic day. Starting from a place of peace is the best way to have a successful busy day. What can you do to come from a place of peace on busy days? “I couldn’t help it. I can resist everything except temptation” ~ Oscar Wilde There are recent discussions that we have developed a Pavlovian response to our technology devices. We hear or see a notification and we stop what we are doing and look to see what it is and whom it is from. Sometimes we are rewarded with good news or a text or message from a special friend. Just like the dogs in Pavlov’s experiment we have been conditioned to respond to these notifications even though many of them aren’t meaningful or important. These interruptions cause us to be less productive because we are constantly disrupting our flow of work and getting off task. During the month of April, I take a technology vacation every weekday from 9:00 AM – 5:00 PM. I check my email, messages, and anything technologically related first thing in the morning and again after 5:00. This has really messed with my online games like Scrabble, Words with Friends and Blitz, but it also making me more productive as I am using that time to read spiritually. I don’t stop and check my mail and get sidetracked from what my current activity is, I am focused on the present moment. I have turned off all notifications so I don’t hear any dings that might tempt me. I learned that I really like these technology vacations when I was at a silent retreat and went 10 days without using any technological devices. I missed not being able to do a Google search every time I wanted to know something, but it helped me get quieter and I was removed from the constant disruptions, and the world didn’t stop because I didn’t answer an email or text. Don’t get me wrong, I love technology; I was the Technology Coordinator for a school district and I believe in it’s potential. However, I feel that we have become too wrapped up in our devices and must balance our use of them so we aren’t like Pavlov’s dogs. So try taking a technology vacation for a day this weekend, or an afternoon, or evening. Turn off your phone or put it on airplane mode, don’t head to Facebook or your other social media tools, turn off the television and computer. Go for a walk in nature, have a conversation with a face-to-face friend, pamper yourself with the quiet time to relax or meditate. Does taking a technology vacation scare you? Are you addicted to your technological devices? How can you take breaks from your technological devices? PS - Just so you know this blog entry was scheduled to post during a time when I am not using technology, this is another way you can still take a break but use the advanced capabilities of the devices. “There is no greater expression of self-love than lovingly anointing ourselves from head to toe with warm oil—this practice is called Abyanga” ~ Sandhiya Ramaswamy
I try to practice abhyanga as often as I can, but during the month of April I make a concerted effort to practice it daily. This is such a good way for me to practice gratitude towards my body; I thank it for all of the amazing things it does on a daily basis that I take for granted. I used to only pay attention to my body when I hurt something. When my back would go out, I injured my knee, or I had frozen shoulder I would then understand how much I count on my back, knees, shoulder and every other joint in my body. It was then that I would pay attention to those areas and give them extra love and support to heal. However, doing a daily self-massage allows me to give thanks to my body and take time to appreciate it. So, what exactly is abhyanga? Abhyanga is a Sanskrit word and is an Ayurvedic massage technique using warm oil to increase circulation, enhance the immune system, reduce stress, and promote sound sleep. I usually do the self-massage techniques in conjunction with my daily bath. You can use any of the following oils: almond, coconut, safflower, sesame, grapeseed or jojoba. If you want specifics about the practice and how to apply the oil there is a great article and video with the steps at The Benefits of Ayurveda Self-Massage “Abhyanga” Living in the desert southwest, my body drinks in the oil. The oil makes my skin feel soft and rejuvenated and it lubricates my joints. We push and abuse our bodies everyday and this practice relaxes me and reminds me how important it is for me to take good care of my body. When was the last time you appreciated your body? What steps can you take to nourish your body like with a self massage? Photography by William Walther WjW Photography “Hurry has become the master. We have stopped sensing the stillness, the stunning fullness and beauty and divine perfection of the moment. Let us be clear that the small, complaining, undisciplined part of ourselves—the distracted character wanting nothing but convenience and ease—is unfit to be the ruler of our new destiny.” ~ Brendon Burchard
One of my favorite parts about April is that I don’t have to hurry. Since my goal is to not have any appointments or meetings during the day, I don’t have to hurry to finish my morning rituals to be somewhere at a certain time. It makes all the difference in being able to find the peace and stillness that exists within me. I love the feeling of bliss that I have after a day of not hurrying. In our day-to-day to life we are rushing from one thing to the next. This month helps me gain perspective on what is important to me, so that when it is over I have the discipline to structure my day so that I remember to pause and only do things that nurture my soul. After April, I try to keep one day a week where I don’t leave the house. Our lives are full and busy with so many things to do and so many more opportunities of additional things to do that we have to stop and make conscious decisions about what to include and what to skip. You must learn to say NO and let go of any guilt that you might feel by not doing something. You are the only person who can take care of yourself and you are in control of the choices you make about how you are going to spend your limited amount of time. It is not easy to take a month to slow down like I do; this April is providing more challenging than others even for me. But try to carve out a weekend, day, afternoon or an evening to slow down and sense the stillness of the present moment that brings you to a state of peace and calm. Has hurry become your master? How can you slow down and live in the present moment? “When we clear the physical clutter from our lives, we literally make way for inspiration and 'good, orderly direction' to enter.” ~ Julia Cameron I am not a hoarder, I get rid of stuff. I clean my closets once a year; usually during April I go through the closets and get rid of things that no longer bring me joy or I don’t use. I was raised in a “neatnik” house and we couldn’t do anything on the weekend until the house was cleaned first. I have given up on that philosophy of living, but I don’t like clutter and I like to keep things clean and see the top of the desk and tables. This is true everywhere except when I am in a creative mood. When I paint or cook I am in the zone and things are a mess with stuff everywhere and I just keep adding as I get further in the flow. When I am done cooking, I clean up the hurricane of a mess and put everything away because this is a space that is lived in. I do not usually clean the art studio because I know I will be back in a day or so and I will want all of that stuff out again, so I just leave it out. But, during April, I only do one task as a time and I finish each task, which includes cleaning up after each task, even in my art room. And what I am learning is that I like entering my creative space each morning without the clutter and mess. I feel that I am coming from a clean slate, a place of peace and it easier to connect to inspiration. It is important to clear the physical and mental clutter and let inspiration into our heart. I clear the mental clutter with meditation, going slowly, being mindful and finishing each task completely before moving on the to next. How do you deal with physical and mental clutter? “We cannot always control everything that happens to us in this life, but we can control how we respond.” ~ L. Lionel Kendrick
Today is a fabulous day, I am in the flow and things are going well. Yesterday I was a "Grumpy Gus" and not feeling the love. It wasn’t a terrible day and nothing major happened, but lots of things weren’t going the way I expected them to go. Things were taking way longer than I was planning and other people were adding things to my plate and I was thinking “Hey it’s my April – I’m on "inner vacation" and no one else is allowed to add things to my plate.” I was not living in the present moment and I was not accepting life as it was happening. So I was aware I was grumpy – it is my choice to be grumpy and the awareness that I was choosing to be grumpy made me stop and ask myself if I wanted to continue to be grumpy or return to the joy and bliss I naturally feel in life. When I am having a hard time, I ask myself the following questions:
For me, this was another reminder that I am not in control of what happens in life. This was not how I was expecting my April to go, but I surrendered to this was what is happening and maybe it will work out even better. I looked at the situation from the other people’s perspective and saw that they were really in need and I wanted to help them out. I reframed the situation to say that every day I am doing a “chore” on my to do list (i.e. organize closets, spring cleaning tasks, yard work) and this is just a different chore and one that will benefit others. Negative energy is wasted energy in my mind, so letting my frustrations go made things so much better and I had a good nights sleep and today was a glorious day. We are all going to have things happen in life, some will be the big things and others will be the trivial day-to-day things. We get to choose how we react. It is always crucial to remember that we are not in control of what happens everyday, but we are responsible for how we respond and it is a choice. And we get to choose whether we make it consciously or unconsciously. Think of a recent situation that was frustrating. What could you learn from it? How could you reframe the situation and look at it from another perspective? What is the benefit of holding on to the anger and frustration or letting it go? How can let go of the little things in life with more ease in the future? “Recapitulation is a valuable practice to use in the evenings just before going to sleep. It’s a way to put yourself in the position of observer of your life, and of your dreams, so that connections, themes, insights, and meaningful coincidences become clearer. In short, this process allows you to access a higher level of consciousness.” ~Chopra Center for Wellbeing
I have attended numerous Chopra Center programs and at each they tell us the importance of a recapitulation practice at the end of the day. Once again, I have let this valuable practice fall from my daily practice and April is a month for me to regain the practice. Prior to falling asleep, you review your day from start to finish as if you were watching a movie. You do this quickly, the whole process should take about five minutes. You don’t evaluate, judge or analyze what you are seeing; you observe objectively. You may notice things you didn’t do consciously and gain insights about the main character in the movie. One of the benefits is to help you develop your witnessing awareness. After you have finished watching the movie of your day, you let it go. One of the benefits of letting it go is so you can sleep easier. You have recapitulated your day. Deepak tells you to say to yourself, “just as I witnessed my day, I will witness my sleep.” I noticed that when I initially started this process, I had little recollection of my dreams, but as I practiced it daily I now remember my dreams more and use the recapitulation process with my dreams to observe objectively without judgment what I experienced in the dream state. One of the key reasons for doing this is to continue to awaken the witnessing awareness so you get in touch with who you really are at your core and to attain higher levels of consciousness. If you have never tried recapitulation, try doing it at the end of the day. Remember the key is to be objective and not judge or evaluation yourself and let the day go. Also ask to witness your sleep and do the recapitulation process with your dreams. “Very few people have ever done deep work in defining their character—the specific identity they wish to have. They simply respond to the world on a whim, without paying any real attention to the type of person they want to be or become.” ~ Brendon Burchard
The quote above comes from Burchard’s book “The Motivation Manifesto” which I highly recommend. I read his book last April as part of my spiritual reading for the month. One of the things that I have learned is that you cannot stay in your head when reading these types of books or the learning is just book knowledge. You must actually do the exercises so that the learning becomes personal. This April, I plan to do deep journaling and answer the questions from the book. A few of the deep questions I plan to answer include:
You don’t need to share your answers, but share what it was like to answer these types of questions. “Taking time to do nothing often brings everything into perspective.” ~ Doe Zantamata
I love vacations and I am just as excited about this April vacation of going within as about the vacations I take to Disneyland (and I love Disneyland). For this trip, I don’t have to pack any bags or leave my house. I am taking time for me and going within to the silence and stillness. I don’t have to rush off to catch a plane, make reservations or hassle with traffic, lines and rental cars. I do the exact opposite, I go slow, I pause between activities, and I reflect. I have time to listen to my body and my heart and I answer their callings. I start this vacation by deliberately going slow. On the first day of the month I want to break free of the habit of rushing from one thing to the next. I do this at the beginning so I set the stage for mindfulness for the rest of the month. I do one thing at a time. I am mindful during the task and totally focus on what I am doing. If a thought arises about something else, I gently release the thought and return to what I am doing. I finish the task before moving on to the next task. I do this because I typically will think of something else that needs to be done while doing a task and an hour later I realize I have never finished the initial task. Then, at the end of each task I pause and take time to appreciate what I have done and to enjoy a sense a peace. Do you ever take time between activities? What can you do to slow down and be more mindful during your day? "The starting point of discovering who you are, your gifts, your talents, your dreams, is being comfortable with yourself. Spend time alone. Write in a journal." ~ Robin S. Sharma One of my favorite parts of my April solitude month is journaling every day. I start each day with my morning meditation and then flow into writing in the journal. I am coming from that silence and stillness of meditation and I the words freely flow to my pen and paper. There is never a plan for what I will write about; sometimes it may be based on something that arose during the meditation. Sometimes it is a list of all the things I am grateful for and other times it is a dialog of thoughts about an issue I am wrestling with and usually by the end I have a plan for dealing with the situation. I have found that writing is really a great way to get to know who I am at my deepest levels. These journal entries are only for me and so I am brutally honest about my flaws, mistakes, and areas I want to improve upon. I also share about the wonderful things in my life too. On the times that I am angry and upset about something, I release all of my feelings on the paper and then I burn the paper as way to symbolize letting go of the situation and moving on. I attended a weeklong silent retreat with the Chopra Center entitled Silent Awakenings which was life changing. I highly recommend this retreat. During our time together, the Chopra staff shared that a journal is a listening device. It is our friend. It allows what needs to be released. I agree with these lessons as I know that journaling allows me to kind and gentle with myself as discover who I am at my core. Plus, through the writing process, I release the things that no longer serve me and I surrender issues that I used to hold on to and dwell on in my mind. Do you have a journaling practice?
“Like too many of us, I mistook a busy life for a rich one.” ~ Anne D. LeClaire Five years ago I read the book Listening Below the Noise: A Meditation on the Practice of Silence by Anne D. LeClaire and it impacted me greatly because she took time to be silent and go within. At that time, I was recently retired and realizing that I still had a very busy life. Even though I was retired and thought I would have to time to do everything I wanted, I quickly realized that I was busy running from one activity to the next. Sound familiar? I was just as busy, if not busier than when I worked full time and I realized it was not the ideal situation for a balanced life. I tried taking a day of silence and I really enjoyed it and realized I wanted more. So, for the past 4 years I have taken the month of April off to be my month to get grounded, go slower, spend more time in silence, connect to nature and focus on answering the questions who I am and what do I want. I don’t schedule any activities during the day – no yoga classes, no art classes, no lunches with friends, no meetings, no doctor’s appointments, no gatherings with friends, etc. I still do things in the evening and on the weekends with my husband, but I have the days to go within. The first year I did this it was novel to my friends and family and I am not even sure they understood. But, now that I am doing this for the fifth year, everyone seems to know and doesn’t even try to schedule anything with me during the month of April. It seems to take me a week to decompress and mindfully accomplish the things on my to do list and then for the next 3 weeks I focus on getting centered, being creative, reading spiritually, and cleansing my body, mind and spirit. After the month, I am rejuvenated and ready to tackle the world again from a calmer and more peaceful mindset. My plan is to share what I am doing in my upcoming blog entries. You may not be as fortunate as I am to take a month to do this, but maybe you can find a week, weekend, day or afternoon for yourself. I am not taking a time out from life, but I am making time to go within and find what matters most to me and what I want in life from a place of peace. How busy is your life? Is it a rich life? When can you find some quiet time to go within and listen to your true desires? The “I put my heart and my soul into my work, and have lost my mind in the process.” ~ Vincent Van Gogh In the old days, before meditation, if someone would have told me “you have lost your mind” I would have been upset. Today, if someone told me “you have lost your mind” I would be excited and thank him or her for noticing. We spend so much time in our lives in our minds – we are thinking about the past or wondering about the future and we miss out on living in the present moment. We only have NOW, this present moment. My goal is to get out of my mind, to put more space between my thoughts. One of the ways that I lose track of time and there is more space between my thoughts is when I am involved in the creative process of painting or quilting. I truly have lost my mind and I don’t think about the past or the future; I am engrossed in what I am doing and am living in the present moment. The other way that I get more space between my thoughts and into a place known as the "gap" is with my daily meditation process. I still have thoughts during meditation, we all do, but I get more space between my thoughts during that stillness and silence. And the best part is that since developing a daily meditation practice, the gaps between my thoughts after meditation is much greater because of the daily exercise of the mind. What do you do where you lose track of time and lose your mind? How could you live more in the present moment? "Love is what we are born with. Fear is what we have learned here. The spiritual journey is the unlearning of fear and the acceptance of love back into our hearts." ~ Marianne Williamson
Today is a good day to focus on love; to love yourself, to love your family and friends, and to love everyone. The last part of the phrase might be difficult because there might have been someone who popped into your head that you said. “I can’t love them.” That is when you need to examine why you can’t love them? Are you angry with that person? Do you believe they caused you harm. You always get to choose how you respond to anything that happens to you in life. When something that we label as bad happens to us, we may be angry with that person. We need to examine the situation and look at why we are upset and how long we want to hold on to the anger. We need to see if we have a core issue that is based on fear and whenever something like this happens; we react like we did from an earlier time. One of my core issues is that I don’t think I am good enough. Somewhere in my childhood, I learned the lesson that I’m not good enough. However, through therapy and dealing with the issue, I know that I am good enough. But, there are times in my life, when I make a mistake or something happens that I immediately resort back to thinking that I am not good enough. That is when I practice awareness, examine the fear, and accept love of myself back into my heart. Do you have more love or fear in your life? How can you unlearn fear and accept love back into your heart? |
Author
Peggy Steffens is an artist and Chopra Certified Meditation Instructor My goal is to build a community with like-minded individuals who want to grow, share and learn from one another. Please post comments to enrich the experience for all.
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