“Don't let people who don't matter too much, matter too much.” ~ Wes Moore
I was recently watching Super Soul Sunday and Oprah was interviewing Wes Moore and he made the statement above and it was a good reminder that I worry too often about what others think. I fell victim to this again recently when I was in a golf tournament. I am relatively new to golf and my husband asked me to join him in a scramble tournament. In scramble format, all players tee off, choose the best shot, and all play their next shots from the location of the best shot. I did not know the other players in the team and I did not want to let them down because of my skill level. I once again was getting worried about what others would think of me. Prior to the day of the event, I practiced at the tournament course and did terrible – I got mad, cussed worse than Melissa McCarthy in her movie The Heat and even threw a club. Even though I meditate daily and practice mindfulness, I am still human and lose my cool (not as much as I used to, but it still happens). After the round of golf and reflecting that I was not living in a mindful and peaceful manner, I knew that I needed to journal about the experience. Awareness is the key, and I was aware that this was atrocious behavior that I wanted to change. As I journaled, I realized that I was not living in the present moment, I was worried about what others would think of me and I was returning to one of my old core beliefs that I was not good enough. Remembering that I took up golf as a fun way to spend time with my husband, enjoy nature and live in the present moment, I knew that I needed to follow that philosophy for the tournament. I also realized I was worrying about people I will probably never see again in my life and I was letting what they thought of me matter way too much. This story has a happy ending as I had a blast at the tournament. I set my intention to do my best and detach from the outcome. No, we didn’t win the tournament, but we weren’t in last place either. I was quite surprised that we used my shot as the best one more times than I ever imagined. I might not hit the ball far, but I hit it straight and with the advantage from the women’s tees I had some drives that we used, along with some chips and putts. I even won the closest to the pin challenge for women (okay it was mostly men in the tournament, but I got a new pair of golf shoes out of it so I was happy), I won a $50 raffle prize and $15.00 at the Casino. I lived in the present moment, enjoyed the beautiful course and the fun times with my husband and the other two men in our team. I never cussed, threw my clubs, or got upset. For me, this was a great reminder to let go of what others think of me, to do my best each and every day and detach from the outcome. Do you ever let people who don’t matter too much, matter too much? What could you do to let go of worrying about what others think about you?
5 Comments
Peggie
9/23/2016 02:31:01 pm
Glad you reminded yourself to live in the moment and have fun. I laughed as your story reminded me of a rally Bill and I participated in many years ago. We received a trophy for "Almost Last Place". We had so much fun and have laughed about it many times over the years.
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9/24/2016 06:31:47 am
Peggy,
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Peggy
9/25/2016 05:52:28 pm
I am saddened to hear that you had a rough day. I am glad to hear that my blog helped. I hope that you had a better day and that you didn't let people who don't matter too much matter too much. I know that when I was working I often let people who didn't matter too much matter way more than they should. It is a lesson that I still need to work on.
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Kathy
10/16/2016 07:12:38 pm
I am incredibly proud of you playing in a golf tournament! My haven't you come a long way since last March when we played golf together "just for fun"! I am so glad that you were able to play with new people, participate in competition and realize it's just for fun! It doesn't matter who you play with as long as you are true to yourself and enjoy your experience. The good shots come when you are enjoying yourself and not worrying about what others are thinking. This blog made me so happy and proud of you!! Can't wait to play again next March!
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Peggy
10/17/2016 09:19:59 am
Thanks Kathy,
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Peggy Steffens is an artist and Chopra Certified Meditation Instructor My goal is to build a community with like-minded individuals who want to grow, share and learn from one another. Please post comments to enrich the experience for all.
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